Sailings his dream but its more than a sport it’s a life style....... how are you going to make this work together?
What we have to understand is that our dreams can be other peoples nightmares ........ living on a boat that doesn’t stay still and crossing oceans with no security is not for everyone. So if sailings his dream how are you going to cope?
If you want to understand, and be part of your partners dream, knowledge is the key!
1. Learn to sail independently and learn how to handle yourself in the different situations that can arise.
2. Know the boat … where everything is, safety gear, sea cocks, and how to put up the sails and start the engine. Know how to navigate and use a GPS, make trip reports and emergency calls on the radio.
Know the joy, experience the fun, that is so important and feel proud when you’ve met the challenge. Sailings his dream but its so important that both partners understand the dynamics, and know what to do if the worst happens.
3. Communication with your partner can be even more important when on the water, identify fears, strong and weak points and work out each ones responsibility. Sailings his dream but you are part of his life! Work out how to be partners on board, team work brings harmony!
I know sailors who have two dinghies to give independence going ashore and having some space from one another.
Finding a corner of the boat to read a book, or a walk along a beach. But don't forget to have fun together too!
Cruising in the company of others and meeting at destinations can be of benefit, giving moral support when needed. Female companionship can be very necessary, take time out together, lunch or some shopping when ashore.
In company its fun to share sundowners, swap stories and plans for the next destination. I have never met a sailor who didn't enjoy a good story and a laugh.
"I just sail around Narragansett Bay with no particular talent. To cruise is the only logical alternative to enjoying the water without actually having to be in it, and that's out for me!
Nope...I can swim, but I know in my heart that absolutely everything in the water swims much better and faster than I can! Why tempt fate? My Significant Other is often frustrated with my rather timid "Fair Weather Only" approach to seafaring!
In fact, I'm woefully deficient in 'nomenclature', as well. I often resort to terms such as 'thingy', especially in moments of intense pressure, like performing a tack in a 15 k wind."
Another sailor, Karen, gives her view ...
“Love him ... but over living aboard ... want to kiss the dirt!”
“Sailings his dream not mine any more!! Still love the life style, the people, and still feel very much at home on our yacht but just need to feel the land under my feet. He still lives aboard and I have a small unit a walk away from the marina.
The simple things of going to the shower and not having to get dressed first, not having to venture out in bad weather to get the laundry done or go to the toilet block. It fits in better to live on land when you work for a living. And yes I feel our relationship is better for it!”
Then there are stories like Carmen's ... read about a brave lady who
decided to continue to follow her dream after the loss of her
husband, in the appropriately named catamaran ... Dream Weaver!
Enjoy Gord Kerr’s account of what it's like offshore, it’s entertaining and what it’s truly like! He should know as he has been circumnavigating the world with his wife Ginny for quite some time!
read one self professed landlubbers story after she agrees to circumnavigate
the world with her husband. Joanna Hackett in her book ‘The Reluctant
Mariner” speaks about topics and issues normally not mentioned in
other cruising books, openly and with humour.
She writes... "Personal habits may require attention within the confines of a yacht – a little fart goes a long way!
Pumping out the head in a busy anchorage with swimmers around is disgusting."
What about the romantic side of the cruising life?
Do not assume because a yacht at anchor has no one on deck that they are making tea and scones for visiting sailors and anxious to socialize.
One cruising couple while enjoying some “afternoon delight” in the forward bunk ignored the calls from a neighboring yacht. But the neighbors undeterred, got in their dinghy and came alongside, calling out to the preoccupied couple. It caused only a slight interruption and a bit of embarrassment for the visitors.
And Joanne Hackett continues in her book...
"Noisy lovers entertain sailors on nearby yachts, as well as those on their own. Unless this is desired, the practice of quite sex is recommended and, even then, one should not be fooled that others on board are unaware of what is occurring.’
‘The sex life of couples cruising alone, while more private, is still, like all things on a yacht, controlled by the weather.
“Not tonight, I have a headache,” becomes, “Not tonight, the winds coming up.” As in life generally, when opportunities arise, don’t miss out. A force eight may be just over the horizon!"
is a fact of life ....
and sex and cruising is not a new concept ..... I mean isn’t that just another
reason why autopilots and radars are an essential piece of equipment on a
So if your man says ... 'Sail away with me honey!" ... What are you going to say? Watch this YouTube ... some one else's experience ... could be you!
At the end of the day most find the lifestyle with its unlimited adventure, shared unique experiences in idyllic conditions and even braving storms, all its diversity constantly shapes your life for the better. And for couples brings you closer together and builds precious memories to last forever. So sailings his dream but can be yours too!
Remember knowledge is the key so learn all you can about the cruising life so that you feel comfortable with it.
And click on the images below to learn more...